[2017 was a bad year for United Airlines. Passenger dress code violations, passenger abuse, and not one but two in flight scorpion sightings.]

The guy should consider himself lucky. United’s in flight scorpion was only two inches long. Like a tiny lobster, someone said.  They do come bigger. The emperor scorpion is eight inches long, but found only in first class. There was a species (Pulmonoscorpius kirktonensis) over two feet long, though that was in the Carboniferous about 340 hundred million years ago and I don’t think United has been around that long, only their dress code. There was also a Devonian scorpion (Jaekelopterus) that was over eight feet long, but it was a freshwater species and unless United had a swimming pool, probably not likely to drop on your head. Besides it was too big for carry on. As opposed to carrion. But that’s another joke.